Pizza: Food of the gods

Ah, pizza, the food of the gods.  "Why," do you ask?  Easy.  Pizza was created by the Italians, who are descendant from the Romans, who had more gods than any other civilization.  I'm pretty sure they even had a god of pizza...OK, so I checked that and there was no god of pizza.  Too bad.  I thought a food that good should deserve its own deity.

Domino!  No no, Meatzopolis! Wait, that's Greek.  I've got it! Extra-Large Cheesus!  All hail Extra-Large Cheesus! The god of 16" round deliciousness! (That's the average size of an extra-large pizza if you weren't aware).  Imagine the body of Buddha with the beard of Jesus (your Jesus may not have had a beard, but mine did; he was Jewish! Remember, Ricky Bobby's Jesus was still 8lbs, 3oz, so replace the head with whichever version you like best).  Still with me, or have I lost you like airline luggage?  If he were a superhero, he's have a belt of pre-cut toppings like pepperoni, sausage, olives, onions and all sorts of additional awesomeness!  Think Batman's belt but in green, white and red.

Mmmm. Pizza time.